The long search for the ‘real’ Diane through this disturbing fantasy is, like much of The Return, a twisted reproduction of the logic of the original Twin Peaks. Diane does not appear in the original two series of Twin Peaks, except in the form of Agent Cooper’s tape recorder. One the many quirky Cooperisms repeated by fans and cosplayers is his frequent, chirpy commentaries on the unfolding enigma of Twin Peaks, addressed always to his unseen secretary at headquarters. A recording of Cooper’s tapes to Diane was even released so that we too could have the fun of piecing together the Agent’s running commentary. (In a sense, this release had the reverse of effect of Jennifer Lynch’s novelisation pf Laura Pamler’s diary, which gave voice the the otherwise absent subject of Twin Peak’s central mystery.)